Top Ten Reasons Han Won’t Let Chewie Take The Falcon For A Spin

1. Chewie insists on putting ‘Don’t Like My Driving? Call 1-800-EAT-FODDER’ on the back of the Falcon.

2. Han stopped letting Chewie take the controls after nasty encounter with bounty hunter at Ord Mantel when Chewie flipped him the bird.

3. Friends don’t let friends fly when they’re in heat.

4. Chewie always puts the deep-space communications bandwidth on KWOOKIE: less talk, more rock.

5. Chewie’s already punctured the airbags with those damned claws of his.

6. When Chewie tells Han to ‘punch it’ in wookie, it loses some effect and doesn’t sound as cool when spoken in English.

7. Chewie constantly forgets to flush, and the stench has started to erode the circuits in the holo-chess game.

8. Chewie always wants to go to Mos Eisley to pick up some digitless babes with horns.

9. Chewie insists Han to sing the low parts in showtunes when they go on long voyages together.

10. He’s always wanting to drag with Imperial Star Destroyers.