Q: What is the definition of a shame (as in “that’s a shame”)?
A: When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
Q: What is the definition of a “crying shame”?
A: There was an empty seat.Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?
A: An offer you can’t understand.

Q. Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?
A. From chasing parked ambulances.

Q. Where can you find a good lawyer?
A. In the cemetery.

Q. What’s the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?
A. A gigolo only screws one person at a time.

Q. What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?
A. A vampire only sucks blood at night.

Q: If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don’t you swerve to hit him?
A: It might be your bicycle.

Q: Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?
A: Because deep down, they’re really good people.

Q: What does a lawyer use for birth-control?
A: His personality.

Q: What can a goose do, a duck can’t, and a lawyer should?
A: Stick his bill up his ass.