If I could rearrange the alphabet, Id sure shootin put U and me together.
I may not have as many teeth as Fred Flinstone, but wanna watch me make my bedrock?
Your eyes are the same color as my 1972 Ford Pickup Truck. I mean without the mud. Or the nude girl on the mud flaps.
Howdy. Youre not the kinda unchristian girl that goes out drinking and then spends the night with the first loser she meets are ya? Well then, how about your uglier friend there?
Well, arent you hotter than a mama cougar in heat running from my hunting dogs in August?
Hey Baby. Wanna go back to my place? Mamma said you had to be home by 11 anyway.
Can I make you a drink? My still is in the back of my camper- Or as I call it- my sheep shack.
Well, tie me to a pig and roll me in the mud! You are mighty purdy for a heavy girl.
Can I borrow your t-shirt? I gotta go wipe the oil off my dip stick.
If I had a garden, Id put your tulips next to my tulips. And then plant some watermelon and probably a few tomato plants. Its a little late in the year for lettuce, but we might be able to still get a few green beans to grow, iffen we add enough fertilizer, and give ‘em a lot of evening water since day water can just kill off those suckers right quick, cuz of how strong the sun is and those water beads just act like a magnifier, which is great for zapping those sunbich aphids but dont do the vegetables no good at all which is why- what was we talking about?
Tell me honey ham, did it hurt when the devil spit you up and you landed here?
Hi there darling. Wow, I bet you were really hot when you were about my age!
Roses are red. Spend the night with me and Ill teach you all kinds of cool scientific stuff like that!
Youre hair is just about as purdy as that squirrels I skinned this morning. And it smells just as good!
A few more beers, and Id probly do ya. So give me a minute darling, and then Ill give you one!