You might be a redneck if. . .

You think harass is two words. You consider fast food hitting a deer at 65 MPH. Every day someone comes to your house mistakingly thinking your having a yard sale. Fifth grade was the best six years of your life. You have more dogs than the local shelter. You consistantly receive credit card offers with a limit of $

Your postman puts rubber gloves on when the red flag is up on your mailbox.

How do you know when your staying in an Arkansas hotel? When you call the front desk and say, “I’ve gotta leak in my sink,” and the person at the front desk says, “Go ahead!”

Did you hear that they have raised the minimum drinking age in West Virginia to 32? It seems they want to keep alcohol out of the high schools!

Why did God invent armadillos? So that rednecks can have ‘possum on the halfshell!

Definition of an Arkansas Virgin: A girl who can run faster than her brothers.