A man, whose level of drunkenness was bordering on the absurd, stood up to leave a bar and fell flat on his face.
“Maybe all I need is some fresh air,” thought the man as he crawled outside.
He tried to stand up again, but fell face first into the mud.
“Screw it,” he thought. “I’ll just crawl home.”
The next morning, his wife found him on the doorstep asleep.
“You went out drinking last night, didn’t you?” she said.
“Uh, yes,” he said sheepishly.
“How did you know?”
“You left your wheelchair at the bar again.”
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Province of Inhambane
Ministry of Fish and Wildlife
MOZAMBIQUE
WARNING
Due to the rising frequency of human-lion encounters, the Ministry of Fish and Wildlife, Inhambane Branch, Mozambique is advising hikers, hunters, fisherman and any motor-cyclists that use the out-of-doors in a recreational or work-related function to take extra precautions while in the bush.
We advise outdoorsmen to wear little noisy bells on clothing so as to give advanced warning to any lions that might be close by so you don’t take them by surprise.
We also advise anyone using the out-of-doors to carry “Pepper Spray” with him or her in case of an encounter with a lion.
Outdoorsmen should also be on the watch for fresh lion activity, and be able to tell the difference between lion cub shit and big lion shit. Lion cub shit is smaller and contains lots of berries and dassie fur. Big lion shit has bells in it, and smells like pepper.
Enjoy your stay in
MOZAMBIQUE
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Alligator mating season (via havingagas.com)
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