1. What do you call a cupboard full of lesbians? A licker cabinet.

2. What do you call an Eskimo lesbian? A Klondyke.

3. What do you call 100 lesbians with guns? Militia Etheridge.

4. Why can’t lesbians diet and wear make-up at the same time? Because they can’t eat Jenny Craig with Mary Kay on their face.

5. Why do lesbians like to be reincarnated as whales? So they can have 10 foot tongues and breathe out of the tops of their heads.

6. What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur Traders.

7. What is a lesbian dinosaur called? A Lickalotapuss.

8. What do you call a lesbian with long fingers? Well Hung.

9. What do two lesbians do when they are having their periods? Fingerpaint.

10. What do lesbians call an open can of tuna? POTPOURRI.

11. What did the lesbian vampire say to her partner? See you next month.

12. Did you hear that Ellen Degeneres drowned? She was found face down in Ricki Lake.

13. How can you tell a tough lesbian bar? Even the pool table doesn’t have balls.

14. Do you know what drag is? It’s when a man wears everything a lesbian won’t.

15. What do you call lesbian twins? Lick-a-likes.

16. How can you tell if a lesbian is butch? She kick-starts her vibrator and rolls her own tampons.

17. What’s the definition of confusion? Twenty blind lesbians in a fish market.

18. What’s the difference between a ritz cracker and a lesbian? One’s a snack cracker, the other a crack snacker!