The problem with the Iraqi army is that they were using Russian defense tactics:
1. Engage the enemy.
2. Draw him into your territory.
3. Wait until winter sets in.

The Iraqi verions of the classic army regulations can be summarized as:
If it doesn’t move, hide behind it.
If it does move, surrender to it.

Iraqi Air Force motto:
I came I saw Iran

Wisdom consists of knowing when to avoid perfection.

Wisdom is what’s left after we’ve run out of personal opinions.

Without data, yours is just another opinion.

Work hard and save your money and when you are old you will be able to buy the things only the young can enjoy.

Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence.

Work is the curse of the drinking class.

Work may be the crabgrass of life, but money is still the water that keeps it green.

You can always find what you’re not looking for.

You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can make a fool of yourself any time.

You can fool all of the people some of the time, some of the people all of the time, and that should be sufficient for most purposes.

You won’t skid if you stay in a rut.

A woman hears from her doctor that she has only half a year to live.

The doctor advises her to marry an economist and to live in South Dakota.

The woman asks: will this cure my illness?

The doctor replies: No, but the half year will seem pretty long.

A teacher at a school for blind kids is taking his school’s soccer team to an “away game”. They stop for a rest break, and to let the kids work off some energy with a little impromptu practice in a nearby pasture. The teacher is sitting in a nearby diner, explaining to another patron how it is that blind kids can play soccer.

“We made a special ball, with a bell in it, so the kids can keep track of where the ball is and what it’s doing by listening for it. They’re pretty good at it too.”

“Very clever!” remarks the other patron.

Just then they are interrupted as another patron, who is looking out the window, says, “Hey! Are you the guy with those damn blind kids from the bus?”

“Yes,” says the teacher, stung by the way “his” kids are being refered to, “what about it? You got something against blind kids?”

“Nothing, ordinarily,” says the guy, still scowling out the window, “but you better get them rounded up quick! They’re kicking the hell out of my best milk cow!”

The following is supposedly a true story relating a situation that actually occurred during the war.

During the Persian Gulf War, I was assigned to go to Saudi Arabia. As I was saying good-bye to my family, my three-year-old son, Christopher, was holding on to my leg and pleading with me not to leave. “No, Daddy, please don’t go!” he kept repeating.

We were beginning to make a scene when my wife, desperate to calm him, said, “Let Daddy go and I’ll take you to get a pizza.”

Immediately, Christopher loosened his death grip, stepped back and in a calm voice said, “Bye, Daddy.”