A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened.

Then he decided to write GOD a letter requesting the $100.
When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to GOD USA, they decided to send it to President Bush.

The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill.
President Bush thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.

The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 and sat down to write a thank you note to GOD, which read:

Dear GOD,

Thank you very much for sending the money, however, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington D.C. and, as usual, those idiots deducted $95.00!

An Israeli doctor said, “Medicine in my country is so advanced, we can take a kidney out of one person, put it in another and have him looking for work in six weeks.”

A German doctor said “That’s nothing! In Germany, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another and have him looking for work in four weeks.”

A Russian doctor said, “In my country, medicine is so advanced, we can take half a heart from one person, put it in another and have them both looking for work in two weeks.”

The American doctor, not to be outdone, said “Hah! We are about to take an asshole out of Texas, put him in the White House and half the country will be looking for work the next day.”

Howard Dean’s wife held a press conference today where she announced that until the election is over she will shave off all her pubic hair and sit on stage with husband Howard, and wearing no panties.

Astounded reporters asked what the message was, to which she replied “Read my lips. No more Bush”

The Election Is Over, The Results Are Known.
The Will Of The People Has Been Clearly Shown.
So Lets All Get Together And Let Bitterness Pass,
I’ll Hug Your Elephant, And You Can Kiss My ASS!!!!!

Doctor Seuss’s take on the 2004 election:

Can we count them with our nose? Can we count them with our toes? Should we count them with a band? Should we count them all by hand?

If I do not like the count, I will simply throw them out. I will not let this vote count stand. I do not like them, AL GORE I am!

Can we change these numbers here? Can we change them, calm my fears? What do you mean, Dubya has won? This is not fair, this is not fun.

Let’s count them upside down this time. Let’s count until the state is mine. I will not let this vote count stand. I do not like it, AL GORE I am!

I’m really ticked, I’m in a snit. You have not heard the last of it. I’ll count the ballots one by one. And hold each one up to the sun.

I’ll count, recount, and count some more. You’ll grow to hate this little chore. But I will not, cannot let this vote count stand. I do not like it, Al Gore I am!

I won’t leave office, I’m stayin’ here. I’ve glued my desk chair to my rear. Tipper, Hillary, and Bubba, too, all telling me that I should sue.

We find the Electoral College vile. Re-count the votes until I smile. We do not want this vote to stand. We do not like it, AL GORE I am!