1. Take someone’s shopping cart and switch the items with stuff from the person next to them’s cart
2. Walk up to complete strangers and say, “Hi! I haven’t seen you in so long!…” etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment
3. Smash the person in front of you on the head with a ham
4. Go up to some old geezer & say “Grandpa!!! You’re ALIVE!!! It’s a MIRACLE!!! etc.”
5. Take something from someone else’s cart, when they say “hey, that’s mine! ” call the security and say that the other … person was trying to take your _____
6. Move “Caution: Wet Floor” signs to carpeted areas.
7. Hide in the center of the clothes circle where people find shirts, and jump out and yell “AIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!”
8. Go into the dressing room, wait a few minutes, then yell “THERES NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!!”
9. Get a batman costume, put it on, and run around the store screaming at the top of your lungs, “COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!” Read More…

I’ve been adding jokes and other funny stuff to this website for quite some time now.

Finally, I’ve found it. THE JOKE itself. Enjoy:

The doctor said, “Jerry, the good news is that I can cure your
headaches, the bad news is that it will require castration.
You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press
on your spine, and the pressure creates one hell of a headache.
The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles.”

Jerry was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to
live for. He couldn’t concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he
had no choice but to go under the knife.

When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time
in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.
As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different
person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.

He saw a men’s clothing store and thought, “That’s what I need – a new
suit.” He entered the shop and told the salesman, “I’d like a new suit.”
The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, “Let’s see…size 44
long.” Jerry laughed, “That’s right, how did you know?” “Been in the
business 60 years!” Jerry tried on the suit. It fit perfectly.

As Jerry admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, “How
about a new shirt?” Jerry thought for a moment and then said, “Sure.”
The salesman eyed Jerry and said, “Let’s see…34 sleeve and 16 and a
half neck.” Jerry was surprised, “That’s right, how did you know?” “Been in the
business 60 years!” Jerry tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly.
As Jerry adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, “How
about new shoes?” Jerry was on a roll and said, “Sure.” The salesman
eyed Jerry’s feet and said, “Let’s see…9-1/2 E.” Jerry was astonished,
“That’s right, how did you know?” “Been in the business 60 years!”

Jerry tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. Jerry walked
comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked,
“How about some new underwear?” Jerry thought for a second and said,
“Sure.” The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe’s waist and said, “Let’s see, size 36.”
Jerry laughed “Ah ha! I got you! I’ve worn size 34 since I was 18 years old.”

The salesman shook his head, “You can’t wear a size 34. A 34 underwear
would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give
you one hell of a headache.”