When they ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?

If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?

Why doesn’t “onomatopoeia” sound like what it is?

Why do ‘tug’boats push their barges?

Why do we sing ‘Take me out to the ball game’, when we are already there?

Why are they called ‘stands’ when they’re made for sitting?

Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?

Why does one get in trouble for WRECKless driving?

Does a fish get cramps after eating?

Why does “slow down” and “slow up” mean the same thing?

A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher’s prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store. The attorney for the railroad immediately cornered the rancher and tried to get him to settle out of court. The lawyer did his best selling job, and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking. After the rancher had signed the release and took the check, the young lawyer couldn’t resist gloating a little over his success, telling the rancher, “You know, I hate to tell you this, old man, but I put one over on you in there. I couldn’t have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning. I didn’t have one witness to put on the stand. I bluffed you!” The old rancher replied, “Well, I’ll tell you, young feller, I was a little worried about winning that case myself, because that durned bull came home this morning.”

Why is it called a “building” when it is already built?

Why do they call them “apartments” when they are all stuck together?

Why is there an expiration date on SOUR cream?

If you keep trying to prove Murphy’s Law, will something keep going wrong?

Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?

How can someone “draw a blank”?

Shouldn’t there be a shorter word for “monosyllabic”?

Why is the word “abbreviate” so long?

Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

What is another word for “thesaurus”?

If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose?

If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?

If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?

If you’re in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

You know how most packages say “Open here”. What is the protocol if the package says, “Open somewhere else”?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why isn’t “palindrome” spelled the same way backwards?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it’s called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it’s called cargo?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can’t they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

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