Manliness defines the physical and behavioral attributes of a real man. (Not a woman, a man.) The subject of much scholarly debate, manliness is regularly addressed in such peer-reviewed journals as Playgirl and Men Magazine. The world’s great inebriated leaders and visionaries, such as Winston Churchill, John F. Kennedy, and George W. Bush are manly, not only because they’re men, but because they’re men who will drink a pint of whiskey and can still run a country and/or take a bullet.
Manliness, like religion, is a truth that permeates all cultures, languages, and action movie studios. However, not all cultures are of equal manliness; Canadians for example are considerably less manly, (although more wealthy), than Mexicans. Moreover, a truly manly man is someone who cuts to the chase, calls it like it is, and sips cognac while playing tackle football in a trenchcoat.
There was this guy. He often went away on trips, far from home, Long trips. While this man was away on his trips, his wife would get very very dissatisfied. Thus, she cheated on him, but when he came back, she felt guilty, so she always told him. Well, after a while, the man got very frustrated with his wife’s adultry, so he went to an adult toy shop. He looked around, but saw nothing special.
The man knew he needed something special, so he decided to tell the salesclerk. “I need something really amazing for my wife. All I see here Read More…
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The man came home drunk at four in the morning, and his wife was all over him, yelling at him, crying because she thought he was with another woman.
“No, honey, I swear, I was at this bar, and it was so fancy that even the urinals were made of gold.”
She said she didn’t believe him so she called the bar.
“Hello,” she said, “I just want to ask one question. My husband claims to have spent the night at your bar and I have one Read More…
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The other night I was invited out for a night with the guys. I told my wife that I would be home by midnight… “promise!”
Well, the hours passed quickly and the beer was going down way too easy. At 3am, drunk as a skunk, I headed for home.
Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed three times. Quickly, I realized she’d probably wake up, so I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for having such a rapid, witty solution, even when smashed, to Read More…
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Some newly married friends were visiting us when the topic of children came up. The bride said she wanted three children, while the young husband said two would be enough for him.
They discussed this discrepancy for a few minutes until the husband thought he’d put an end to things by saying boldly, “After our second child, I’ll just have a vasectomy.”
Without a moment’s hesitation, the bride retorted, “Well, I hope you’ll love the third one as if it’s your own.”
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Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, “It’s the pharmacist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone.”
Immediately the husband drove downtown to confront the phamacist and demand an apology.
Before he could say more than a few words, the druggist told him, “Now, just a minute, please listen to my side of it…
This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without Read More…
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