Manliness defines the physical and behavioral attributes of a real man. (Not a woman, a man.) The subject of much scholarly debate, manliness is regularly addressed in such peer-reviewed journals as Playgirl and Men Magazine. The world’s great inebriated leaders and visionaries, such as Winston Churchill, John F. Kennedy, and George W. Bush are manly, not only because they’re men, but because they’re men who will drink a pint of whiskey and can still run a country and/or take a bullet.
Manliness, like religion, is a truth that permeates all cultures, languages, and action movie studios. However, not all cultures are of equal manliness; Canadians for example are considerably less manly, (although more wealthy), than Mexicans. Moreover, a truly manly man is someone who cuts to the chase, calls it like it is, and sips cognac while playing tackle football in a trenchcoat.
A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother. Her mother asked, “How was the honeymoon?”
“Oh, Mama,” she replied, “the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic…” Suddenly she burst out crying. “But, Mama, as soon as we returned, Sam started using the most horrible language…things I’d never heard before! I mean, all these awful 4-letter words! You’ve got to come get me and take me home…. Please Mama!”
“Sarah,” her mother said, “calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? What 4-letter words?”
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A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor’s office.
After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, “Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don’t do the following, your husband will surely die.”
“Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him. Don’t burden him with chores. Don’t discuss your problems with him, it will only make his stress worse. No nagging. And most importantly, make love with your husband several times a week. Read More…
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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny.
So the husband offered to donate some of his own skin. However, the only skin on his body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from his buttocks.
The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.
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A young couple were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they undressed for bed, the husband, who was a big burly bruiser, tossed his pants to his bride and said, “Here, put these on.”
She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body. “I can’t wear your pants,” she said.
“That’s right and don’t forget it,” said the husband. “I’m the man in this family.” Read More…
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I ran into Jim at work yesterday. He had been out for a few days with the flu. I asked him how he was feeling. “I’m better, thanks. You know, it was a wonderful experience.” he replied.
“Wonderful? How can the flu be wonderful?” I asked in stunned disbelief.
“Well, I learned that my wife really loves me. You know that whenever the mailman came by or a delivery man headed toward the door, my wife ran out to meet them? I could hear her excitedly saying, ‘My husband is home! My husband is home!”
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