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Di! Ecce hora! Uxor mea me necabit!
God, look at the time! My wife will kill me!

Non calor sed umor est qui nobis incommodat.
It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity.

Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre?
Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?

Lex clavatoris designati rescindenda est.
The designated hitter rule has got to go.

Sentio aliquos togatos contra me conspirare.
I think some people in togas are plotting against me.

Caesar si viveret, ad remum dareris.
If Caesar were alive, you’d be chained to an oar.

Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

(At a barbeque)
Animadvertistine, ubicumque stes, fumum recta in faciem ferri?
Ever noticed how wherever you stand, the smoke goes right into your face?

Sona si Latine loqueris.
Honk if you speak Latin.

Si Hoc Legere Scis Nimium Eruditionis Habes
If you can read this you’re over-educated

Sentio aliquos togatos contra me conspirare.
I think some people in togas are plotting against me.

Vidi Vici Veni
I saw, I conquered, I came

Vacca foeda
Stupid cow

Mihi ignosce. Cum homine de cane debeo congredi.
Excuse me. I’ve got to see a man about a dog.

Raptus regaliter
Royally screwed

Si hoc signum legere potes, operis boni in rebus Latinus alacribus et fructuosis potiri potes!
If you can read this sign, you can get a good job in the fast-paced, high-paying world of Latin!

Gramen artificiosum odi.
I hate Astroturf.

Nihil curo de ista tua stulta superstitione.
I’m not interested in your dopey religious cult.

Noli me vocare, ego te vocabo.
Don’t call me, I’ll call you.

Nullo metro compositum est.
It doesn’t rhyme.

Non curo. Si metrum non habet, non est poema.
I don’t care. If it doesn’t rhyme, it isn’t a poem.

Fac ut gaudeam.
Make my day.

Braccae illae virides cum subucula rosea et tunica Caledonia-quam elenganter concinnatur!
Those green pants go so well with that pink shirt and the plaid jacket!

Visne saltare? Viam Latam Fungosam scio.
Do you want to dance? I know the Funky Broadway.

Re vera, potas bene.
Say, you sure are drinking a lot.

Utinam barbari spatium proprium tuum invadant!
May barbarians invade your personal space!

Utinam coniurati te in foro interficiant!
May conspirators assassinate you in the mall!

Utinam logica falsa tuam philosophiam totam suffodiant!
May faulty logic undermine your entire philosophy!

Radix lecti
Couch potato

Quo signo nata es?
What’s your sign?

O! Plus! Perge! Aio! Hui! Hem!
Oh! More! Go on! Yes! Ooh! Ummm!

Mellita, domi adsum.
Honey, I’m home.

Tam exanimis quam tunica nehru fio.
I am as dead as the nehru jacket.

Ventis secundis, tene cursum.
Go with the flow.

Totum dependeat.
Let it all hang out.

Te precor dulcissime supplex!
Pretty please with a cherry on top!

Magister Mundi sum!
I am the Master of the Universe!

Fac me cocleario vomere!
Gag me with a spoon!

Te audire no possum. Musa sapientum fixa est in aure.
I can’t hear you. I have a banana in my ear.

Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre?
Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?

Prehende uxorem meam, sis!
Take my wife, please!

Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Nihil est–in vita priore ego imperator Romanus fui.
That’s nothing–in a previous life I was a Roman Emperor.

Recedite, plebes! Gero rem imperialem!
Stand aside plebians! I am on imperial business.

Vescere bracis meis.
Eat my shorts.

Sic faciunt omnes.
Everyone is doing it.

Fac ut vivas.
Get a life.

Anulos qui animum ostendunt omnes gestemus!
Let’s all wear mood rings!

Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.
I have a catapult. Give me all the money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head.

In the second day, Dio spoke and said “ZA WARUDO”. Then Smif answered “Say please!”
———–
smif is the only soldier in eRepublik who gets a 5/5 supershot by pressing the skip button
———–
And again we thank dsalageanu for his help.

1. If you are his friend, be careful. Smifs shouts can cause your wellness to drop by 5 points. And that is if he’s in a cheery mood…

2. The only solutions to any county’s border security is an MPP with Smif, personnaly.

3. Smifs personal productivity exceeds the GDP of many small countries in the New World.

4. If Smif moves to a region, it automatically becomes high productive in all raw materials.

5. Smif, on average, is abut 7.342,00% more effective than a Defence System Q5.

6. Smifs military strength has already exceeded the maximum of 65535 but due to the fact that Erepublik cannot work with bigger numbers, it displays a reseted countdown.

7. Smif does not consume food. Instead, he is highly dependant on high amounts of iron Q5. Allegedly, there are 2 iron companies in Podolia especially designated to still his hunger…

8. Smifs presence in an enemy region instantly destroys its Defence System. Because there is no defence against Smif.

9. Smif can start a resistance war even if the region already belongs to its original owner country.

10. The Romanian Q5 weapons industry is designated exclusively for Smif. He has to take at least 4-5 weapons in every fight, in order for these not to melt in his hands like chocolate. He uses lower quality weapons for snacks, between fights.

11. Smif does not own a house. He doesn’t need a wellness boost, because there is no known method to decrease his wellness.

12. Atlantis and PEACE are there just for Smifs amusement. Although he could take them down single-handedly, he decided that its really cute when little people play army…

13. V1 got a lot better because bugs (like all creatures) are too terrified by Smifs wrath to make an appearance.

14. Admins wanted to declare Smif as a country, but realized that this would lead to the iminent dissapearance of any other national form of organization in the New World…

15. Smif can break his victims’ “revive character” button and there is nothing admins can do about it.

16. One bug the admins can’t fix is Smif moving around without a moving ticket…

17. If you log in on Smif’s account and buy gold you would have 3 payment methods: Pay-Pal, Credit Card and Smif. The las one, of course, is free of charge.

18. When Smif clicks the Contact button all the admins shit their pants and Alexis Bonte has a heart atack!

You’re probably wondering what’s a Smif?

Smif is the strongest player in eRepublik, a multiplayer online game.

This list was compiled by dsalageanu (with some help from Shadow Figure)

Men are like department stores…. their clothes should always be half off.

Men are like vacations…. they never seem to be long enough.

Men are like computers… hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

Men are like coolers… load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.

Men are like chocolate bars…. sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.

Men are like coffee…. the best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.

Men are like horoscopes…. they always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.

Men are like plungers… they spend most of their lives in a hardware store or the bathroom.

Men are like cement…. after getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.