The jokes about blondes have been made by the blondes themselves. This is because they want to confuse their enemies. The plan is to make people laugh so bad, that they might die from it. So far, the plan hasn’t been succesful, as we all can see. People laugh much about it. Let’s just face it: the jokes about blond bimbos are not funny enough. The blondes have now started to work on a new plan. Their secret headquarters is stationed right under the South Pole. Actually, they had planned to place it on the North Pole, but they did like Columbus, and went the wrong way. The reason why they wanted to go to the North Pole, was because they wanted to be closer to Santa Claus.
The truth is, blondes can not help being dumb. The reason they are so dumb is because when god made them, he installed a special chip. This chip “controls” what they say. Here is how it works: A blonde is asked, “How many sides are on an octagon?”. Before she can say the right answer, 8, the chip redirects her. This is what she is now thinking: Well, an octopus lives in the ocean. The ocean is blue. There are 4 letters in blue. So her answer would be 4. This is how the chip works.
Two blondes are walking in the forest when they come across marks in the ground.
One says to another, ‘Oh, look at the deer tracks!’
‘Those aren’t deer trucks, you dumb blonde!’ says the other. ‘They’re bear prints.’
‘Deer tracks, you dumb blonde!’
‘Bear prints, you dumb blonde!’
Next day’s headlines : Two blondes killed by train in forest.
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There are three blondes washed up on an island. Suddenly a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them one wish.
The first blonde asks to be intelligent. Instantly, she is turned into a brown haired woman and she swims off the island.
The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, so instantly she is turned into a ravishing redhead. The redhead builds a boat and sails off the island.
The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The fairy turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.
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A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to the counter, SLAMS a book down and screams at the librarian, – “This is the WORST book I’ve ever read!” “It has NO plot and far too many characters!”
The librarian looks up and calmly remarks – “So, you’re the one who took our phone book…”
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The Rope
There were 11 people hanging onto a rope that came down from a plane. Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette.
They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn’t, the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette said, “I’ll get off.”
After a really touching speech from the brunette about how she would get off, all of the blondes started clapping.
Problem solved.
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A new TV game show in Hollywood had many contestants who were beautiful, but they weren’t necessarily too smart. On one show, one such woman was extremely nervous, but tried to make the best of her performance.
The host asked, “Who was the first man, for one thousand dollars?”
She responded, “The first man was Peter, my postman, but he only paid me one hundred dollars!”
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