Q: What does a blonde do after waking up?
A1: Go Home.
A2: Introduce herself to the guy on the bed.

A blonde and a brunette were watching the 11:00 pm news. The current
news story was about a man up on a ledge and threatening to jump, when the station cuts to a commercial.

Brunette: I bet you $20 he’s going to jump.
Blonde: OK.

(Back to newscast : He jumped!)
Blonde: OK. I lost. Here’s my $20 to you.
Brunette: No, that was too easy. I can’t take it.
Blonde: I insist. I lost.

Brunette: I have a confession to make. I saw the same thing on the
6:00pm news and I knew he jumped. So it wasn’t really a good bet.

Blonde: I know. I saw the same newscast at 6 too. But I didn’t think he would be stupid enough to jump TWICE!

Q: How do you tell when a blonde reaches orgasm?

A1: She drops her nail-file!
A2: Who cares?
A3: She says, “Next”.
A4: The next person in the queue taps you on the shoulder.
A5: He’s had his clothes for about 2 minutes.
A6: I mean, who really cares?
A7: The batteries have run out.

A business man got on an elevator in a building. When he entered the
elevator, there was a blonde already inside and she greeted him by
saying, “T-G-I-F”? (letters only).

He smiled at her and replied,”S-H-I-T” (letters only).”

She looked at him, puzzled, and said, “T-G-I-F” again.

He acknowledged her remark again by answering, “S-H-I-T.”

The blond was trying to be friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile and
said as sweetly as possibly “T-G-I-F” another time.

The man smiled “S-H-I-T.”

The blond finally decided to explain things, and this time she said,
“T-G-I-F, Thank Goodness It’s Friday, get it?”

The man answered, “Sorry, Honey, It’s Thursday.

What does the left leg of a nymphomaniac say to her right leg?

Nothing, they have never met