1. want to know God’s thoughts… the rest are details.
Albert Einstein

2. An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.
M.K. Gandhi

3. Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.
Dr. Napoleon Hill

4. Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
Mark Twain

5. Great works are performed, not by strength, but by perseverance.
Samuel Johnson

6. Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
Mark Twain

7. If you judge people, you have no time to love them.
Mother Teresa

8. Where does the family start? It starts with a young man falling in love with a girl – no superior alternative has yet been found.
Sir Winston Churchill

9. A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.
William James

10. A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong, gives it a superficial appearance of being right
Thomas Paine

11. A love affair with knowledge will never end in heartbreak.
Michael Garrett Marino

12. Before God we are all equally wise – and equally foolish.
Albert Einstein

13. Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
Napoleon Bonaparte

14. A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
Sir Winston Churchill

15. In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
Martin Luther King Jr.

16. The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don’t have it.
George Bernard Shaw

17. We have art to save ourselves from the truth.
Friedrich Nietzsche

18. Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
Napoleon Bonaparte

19. Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
H. G. Wells

20. Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.
Edward George Bulwer-Lytton

21. God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.
Voltaire

22. I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.
Thomas Alva Edison

23. The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.
James Branch Cabell

24. Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
Jimmy Durante

25. A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.
Dwight D. Eisenhower

26. All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.
Arthur Schopenhauer

27. Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.
Will Durant

28. When you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.
Friedrich Nietzsche

29. Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
Jean-Paul Sartre

30. It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
Oscar Wilde

Bill Gates, the founder of Microsoft decided to retire.
Here is what Jon Swift says about it:

”

• Any new Gates will be backward compatible with the old one
• Even if he announced it some while back, there were delays and it was postponed many time
• He could have been retired prematurely before solving all the bugs. They could decide to go to a retire beta testing phase to solve the bugs. They could announce Retirement 2.0, and the new new bugs will be solved in Retirement 2.0 SE
• The entire retirement process may be scrapped and a new retirement process may be started from scratch. This retirement process may then be abandoned after a year and Microsoft would go back to the first retirement process.
• While some fear that Gates’ retirement might spark a mass exodus of talent from Microsoft, this will probably not happen soon. More than likely his retirement package will become so bloated that it will hog most of Microsoft’s resources. This will make it difficult for others to retire while Gates is retiring.
• His retirement may be delayed by CEOs of other companies trying to retire. They may complain that Gates has an unfair monopoly on retirement. At this point the Justice Department may have to get involved to analyze the impact of his retirement on the CEOs of other companies. The European Union may decree that he cannot retire.
• Other companies may also complain that the “look and feel” of Gates’ retirement package is eerily similar to the retirement packages of their CEOs, which might cause some delays while this is litigated. Microsoft will claim that any apparent similarities are superficial.
• Gates’ retirement may cause Microsoft’s stock to crash causing you to lose any profits that you have not saved. Don’t worry. This is a normal part of the retirement process. In the future you may want to save your profits more often in case the stock crashes again. Microsoft will not be responsible for any profits lost.
• Gates’ retirement is going to be a very slow process. Get up, make yourself a cup of coffee. Make yourself two cups of coffee. Chances are when you get back to your desk, Gates still won’t be retired. In fact, the entire retirement process may get hung up and have to be restarted again from the beginning.

” End of quote.
Seen it at zoso, from spinei

Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, “You know, I know everyone there is to know.
Just name someone, anyone, and I know them.”

Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, “OK, Bubba how about Tom Cruise?”

“Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it. ” So Bubba and his boss
fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise’s door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise
shouts, “Bubba! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me
for lunch!”

Although impressed, Bubba’s boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise’s
house, he tells Bubba that he thinks Bubba’s knowing Cruise was just lucky.

“No, no, just name anyone else,” Bubba says.

“President Clinton,” his boss quickly retorts.

“Yes,” Bubba says, “I know him, let’s fly out to Washington.”

And off they go. At the White House, Clinton spots Bubba on the tour and motions
him and his boss over, saying, “Bubba, what a surprise, I was just on my way to
a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let’s have a cup of coffee first
and catch up.”

Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced.

After they leave the White house grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba, who
again implores him to name anyone else.

“The Pope,” his boss replies. “Sure!” says Bubba. “My folks are from Poland, and
I’ve known the Pope a long time.”

So off they fly to Rome. Bubba and his boss are assembled with the masses in
Vatican Square when Bubba says, “This will never work. I can’t catch the Pope’s
eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just
go upstairs and I’ll come out on the balcony with the Pope.” And he disappears
into the crowd headed toward the Vatican.

Sure enough, half an hour later Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony. But
by the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is
surrounded by paramedics.

Working his way to his boss’ side, Bubba asks him, “What happened?”

His boss looks up and says, “I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on
the balcony and the man next to me said, “Who’s that on the balcony with Bubba?”

# Remember that postcard Grandpa sent us from Florida of that Alligator biting that woman’s bottom? That’s right, we all thought it was hilarious. But, it turns out we were wrong. That alligator was sexually harrassing that woman.
# Old people don’t need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.
# How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?
# Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
# Homer no function beer well without.
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I’m sure you’ve seen this before, but it’s a MUST HAVE on any humor website.

High School/Jr.High

  10 PRINT "HELLO WORLD"  20 END

First year in College

program Hello(input, output)

     begin

writeln('Hello World')    end.

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