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Darth Vader’s Top Ten Pet Peeves




10. Having to live a good part of my life with the name ‘Anakin.’

9. Obi-Wan Kenobi keeps appearing in the middle of the night saying ‘I told you so!’

8. Boba Fett gets all the chicks.

7. All I did was torture hundreds of innocent people, wipe out an entire generation of Jedi Knights, assist in destroying the rightful government in exchange for a malevolent dictatorship, destroy a planet, torture my daughter that I didn’t even know existed, chop off my son’s hand and I’m the bad guy.

6. The way G.M. tries to skirt around installing new safety features (Whoops! Sorry, that’s a Ralph Nader pet peeve).

5. That darn Energizer bunny.

4. Whenever I eat at a KFC, everyone jokes that I’ll only eat dark meat.

3. Wiseguys who come up to me saying ‘This is CNN.’

2. When appearing together at military functions, The Emperor always insists on wearing his ‘I’m with stupid’ T-shirt.

1. I’m seen as a dark lord representative of all that’s evil, but Newt Gingrich is a national celebrity.

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